Chapter 30: They Are Using Me as Kitchenware, Aaaah!

Lin Youwei’s pupils contracted slightly: "Could it be..."

The little bastard’s dog face suddenly turned fawning: "Hehe... I just borrowed a tiny bit of the Goddess of the Moon’s divine power..."

"What?!" Lin Youwei grabbed it by its dog ears. "You stole my divine power?!"

"Ouch, ouch, ouch!" The little bastard kicked its four paws wildly. "Just a little bit! Really, just a little bit! I couldn't cook without any divine power!"

Lin Youwei crossed her arms: "Fine, I’ll forgive you this time."

She pointed at the little bastard’s dog nose: "But, let this be the last time."

The little bastard nodded like a pecking chicken: "Yes, yes, yes!"

Yu Yue suddenly thought of something, her eyes lighting up: "Little bastard! Can you turn into an oven too?"

The little bastard’s dog eyes gleamed instantly: "Of course I can! But..."

It rubbed its front paws together, revealing a sly smile: "It’ll cost extra divine power~"

The little bastard and Yu Yue both looked at Lin Youwei with fawning expressions; the human and the dog looked remarkably similar.

Lin Youwei: "..."

No one noticed that a new line of oracle text had quietly emerged at the bottom of the oven:

『Kill her.』
〖Find an opportunity.〗
〖Kill Him.〗

And below this line, another crooked, scrawled note appeared:

『Great God, they are making me act as kitchenware, ahhh!!!』

Tong City, underground garage.

"There are so many cars, but we don't have the keys." Yu Yue excitedly left handprints on every car. The little bastard followed her, dedicated to helping her leave her marks.

"These cars are great, but there are no keys." Yu Yue sighed, leaning against a car window to look inside.

"Isn't the solution right here?"

The little bastard shrank back: "No, no, why are you all looking at me?"

Li Luyan grabbed the back of the little bastard’s neck: "Is it really that hard to turn into a car key?"

The little bastard’s four legs kicked wildly in the air: "Turning into a key is fine, but, but I’ll be detected by the anti-theft alarm system! I am a noble divine creation!"

Yu Yue’s eyes brightened: "Then why not just turn into a car?"

The little bastard’s dog face instantly fell: "Excuse me? Did I hear that right? Do you take me for a Transformer that can shift whenever it wants?!"

Lin Youwei suddenly reached out and pressed down on the little bastard’s dog head: "Try it."

"Wait—"

A flash of golden light exploded.

Yu Yue subconsciously covered her eyes.

The next second, a shimmering golden convertible sports car appeared in the center of the garage, the hood still retaining the little bastard’s signature aggrieved expression from its puppy form.

The two headlights had become two dazzling sapphires; it was as flamboyant as it was impractical.

"I hate you all... you big meanies!" the little bastard’s resentful voice drifted out from the sports car’s sound system.

Yu Yue cheered, pulled open the driver’s side door, and sat in: "Woohoo, go, go, go! Let's hit the road!"

Li Luyan frowned: "Can you even drive?"

It wasn't that Li Luyan didn't trust her, but Yu Yue’s usual lazy and scattered demeanor had left too deep an impression.

"I only failed my driving test three times!" Yu Yue gripped the steering wheel confidently. "Anyway, we don't need a license anymore!"

The sports car suddenly shifted into reverse on its own, careening backward and slamming into the wall, denting the rear bumper.

"Ahhh, little bastard, what are you doing! I’m still in the car, are you trying to murder me?" Yu Yue screamed wildly while spinning the wheel.

"I refuse to be a road hazard!"

The car’s windshield wipers swung angrily. "Let Lin Youwei drive! She looks the most reliable!"

Lin Youwei silently opened the car door, a hint of helplessness flashing in her eyes: "I'll do it."

"Vroom, vroom, vroom!"

Amidst the roar of the engine, the golden sports car surged out of the underground garage.

Even the exhaust fumes shimmered with gold dust. The God of Desire’s style was truly ostentatious; no wonder they were the embodiment of desire.

The sunlight hit the car body, refracting dazzling rays of light.

Yu Yue stood up in her seat, shouting excitedly: "We are the brightest stars of the apocalypse! Ahhhhh!"

Li Luyan held her forehead, speechless: "If you keep screeching, I’m kicking you out."

Yu Yue covered her mouth with a wronged expression: "..."

The weather was getting hotter, and the asphalt roads cracked due to thermal expansion.

In the surrounding residential buildings, refugees who hadn't managed to leave spotted the flashy, gold-plated sports car and began waving from their windows.

Someone had hung a white bedsheet from a window, with 'SOS' written in red paint.

"Is that the military?"

"Save us!"

Lin Youwei couldn't bear it and pulled the car to a stop. A commotion erupted among the nearby residents. Li Luyan felt a headache coming on; it felt as if hundreds of ducks were quacking in her ears at the same time.

Yu Yue and Li Luyan looked at Lin Youwei simultaneously. Was she actually going to save these residents? In the apocalypse, you could barely fend for yourself; it would be a disaster for the team to have a saintly figure like that.

But Lin Youwei simply rolled down the window and called out to the surroundings: "The military is highly unlikely to come."

"It's been so many days; staying trapped at home will only lead to starvation."

"Everyone should find a way for themselves." Her voice was imbued with divine power, cutting straight through to people's hearts.

Without waiting for the residents to respond, she slammed on the gas.

"Vroom, vroom, vroom!"

Before the residents could react, the golden sports car sped away.

Though Lin Youwei had a kind nature, she wasn't a fool. They said that in chaotic times, the first to die are the saints; now, self-preservation was paramount.

...

"Thirty thousand!" The man in the pure white T-shirt took a drag of his cigarette and threw the tile onto the table.

"Pong." Another man, slightly older with a scar over his right eye, slowly pushed out two 'thirty thousand' tiles and drew one from the end of the deck.

He looked up and smiled at the man in the white T-shirt, as if provoking him, or perhaps as if he saw through everything, the win already firmly in his grasp.

"Come on, Old Zhou, that’s a bit underhanded." The man in the white T-shirt exhaled a cloud of smoke, his lips moving rapidly as a few droplets of saliva flew out in a parabolic arc, splattering onto the tiles.

Old Zhou raised one eye and continued playing his hand: "Mahjong!"

"All one suit."

He said it very lightly, as if he had anticipated the win all along.

The man in the white T-shirt slammed the table and stood up, the small stool behind him toppling over with his sudden movement.

It made a harsh, grating sound against the floor.

"Old Zhou, you cheated!"

The man called Old Zhou finally looked up at him with both eyes: "Old Rotten-Tooth, a bet is a bet. We agreed that if I won, you’d give me your sister."

"How can you have no sense of honor?"

Old Rotten-Tooth cursed internally. It was the apocalypse; who cared about honor? But this Old Zhou was an ex-convict and, more importantly, an ability user.

Even with his many brothers, he couldn't afford to offend a man like this.

Trading a girl for an ability-user brother was worth it.

Thinking this, he calmed down. A smile returned to his fleshy face as he hooked his arm around Old Zhou’s shoulder.

"Haha, of course, a bet is a bet."

"I'll have my sister in your room tonight."