38 Interests

Everyone present felt a chill at these words. Instinctively, the criminal investigators began to fire questions:

"Who killed him?"
"Did you kill him?"
"Why didn't you call the police?"
"Where is the body?!"

Xu Yuan laughed self-deprecatingly. "How could I kill him? Even now, when I see him in my dreams, he still has that kind, gentle face, even though I can barely remember what he looked like anymore. I dream of his back as he walked away alone, crying. I dream of him carrying me home step by step, and of us huddled together on a cold, hard wooden bed, sharing a single quilt for warmth. I know he wasn't a good father, but I can't change how I feel. I always feel guilty toward him."

He was trapped, wandering the same old dreams, masochistically wounding himself.

Xu Yuan looked like a plant that hadn't been watered; his limbs hung withered and yellow, and even his breath sounded weak and desolate.

"In elementary school, we were only allowed to be day students. Every day after school, I had to walk two or three kilometers. By the time I got home, it was already dark, and my father was usually gone. I’d finish my homework and cook dinner, then go out to find him. Sometimes he’d be so drunk he wouldn't remember the way home.

"I would go from door to door, asking everyone if they had seen him. If I was lucky and caught him while he was still sober, he would take my hand and we’d walk back together. When he’d been drinking, he was more candid than usual—less burdened by his frustrations. He would be happy because of the things I said, telling me I was a good son and that I should make a fortune so he could live in luxury. In those moments, I could truly feel a brief flash of happiness.

"If I was unlucky, the people drinking around him would deliberately taunt him. When he saw me, he would fly into a rage and beat me in front of everyone just to entertain them. Then, after we got home, he would hug me and cry, pouring out his heart—cursing my mother’s cruelty, his own worthlessness, and my lack of understanding.

"A few times, he got so drunk he fell into the fields by the road, and it would take me until late at night to find him. I’d crouch beside him, calling him 'Dad' over and over to wake him up. I felt happy while waiting for him, even if there was no reason to be."

As Xu Yuan recounted these memories—which held little value to anyone else—he spoke with a sincere sense of nostalgia. Even though the "poison" hadn't been disguised, he still found it beautiful. He swallowed it greedily, savoring the subtle, bloody, metallic sweetness. "I treated it like a game of hide-and-seek between father and son. I thought if we just kept going like this, our relationship would eventually improve. After all, we depended on each other; if one of us were gone, the other wouldn't be able to survive. Isn't that what family is?"

The people in the hospital room fell silent. No one could find the right answer to whether or not that was true.

Xu Yuan continued, "I made every effort I could. I didn't complain about heaven or others, nor did I give up on myself, but it was all in vain. No matter what I gave, I always lost more than I gained, and even when I did gain something, nothing lasted. For me, life was a game with no difficulty cap. Everyone else had everything, but for me, everything became scarce.

"I admit I am greedy. I forced myself to crave the affection others weren't willing to give. I was tossed aside like something worthless, yet I still groveled for more. I possessed wealth most people only dream of, yet I couldn't feel satisfied. I held a huge stack of chips, but I was obsessed with a poker table where I couldn't place a bet."

Xu Yuan’s low, slow tone carried a lingering, desolate sadness, revealing his nature: clear-eyed yet obsessed, unable to pull himself out, willfully wallowing in his own depravity until he was terminally ill.

"Sometimes I fantasize: what if I had returned to that old home with the wealth I have now—even just one percent, one-thousandth of it? How happy my father would have been. Why was the method so simple, yet it never happened at the right time?"

The handcuffs rattled. The metallic sound punctuated his clear voice.

Xu Yuan kept his head down, staring at the swollen, purplish-red bruises on his wrists. He was lost in thought, his eyes as faint and unfathomable as mist.

"I knew long ago that he was a fragile and sensitive man who couldn't withstand gossip. He had no willpower, was pessimistic and gloomy, and his moods were unpredictable. He would take his own random thoughts as truth without ever verifying them... so he chose to commit suicide." Xu Yuan said, "Because of a few false threats from others, he drank a few bottles of liquor and hanged himself from the light fixture in the living room. I woke up in a daze, crawled to the wall to turn on the light, and saw him staring at me with his eyes wide open, unable to close them in death."

Captain Feng felt an overwhelming sense of fatigue. He pressed his throbbing temples and asked, "And the body?"

Xu Yuan didn't answer. He locked eyes with the captain, his expression going blank, as if his soul had left his body.

Captain Feng stepped forward, grabbed his collar, and repeated with emphasis: "Xu Yuan, where is your father's body!"

Xu Yuan used his free left hand to pry open the Captain’s fingers, digging his nails viciously into the officer's skin, and said with languid contempt, "Honorable police officers, isn't finding the body your job? Do you expect to be spoon-fed in every case?"

The tone of his voice was completely different from before, so even his insolent shouting didn't just annoy those present—it sent a shiver of dread through them.

Ji He rubbed the back of his neck, leaned against the wall, and listened with a lazy, detached air.

Lu Shengxing held his bag in both hands, observing the group with a sort of naive curiosity, wise enough not to interrupt the police interrogation.

Captain Feng pulled his hand back. Looking at the nail marks on the back of his hand, he felt like he’d been scratched by a mad dog. He bared his teeth and hissed, "A grasshopper in late autumn, still trying to jump? Do you have any idea what your situation is?"

Xu Yuan spat in disdain, his eyes flashing with malice. "So what if I do? My life was ruined long ago! If it weren't for Liang Yizheng, I would have made something of myself by now! With my looks, my intelligence, and my vision, what couldn't I achieve? But now I have nothing, so what do I have to fear!"

Captain Feng retorted bluntly, "How many liters of deluding poison did you drink to get yourself this confused? Haven't you ever looked in a mirror?"

Xu Yuan sneered, baring his teeth. "No matter how I look in the mirror, I’m a human being. No matter how you look into the lens, you’re just like Liang Yizheng—a beast!"

Captain Feng was choked with anger. He pointed at him and turned to ask Lu Shengxing, "Can you switch him back?"

Lu Shengxing stood at attention, blinked, and asked, "Switch him back to where? To his original self?"

Captain Feng said, "Switch him back to Xu Yuan!"

Xu Yuan yelled, "I am Xu Yuan! Are you blind too?"

Lu Shengxing evaluated the situation and said regretfully, "Probably not. The amount of data loaded into him is limited. It’s pretty good that he can say such a long paragraph."

Captain Feng felt a surge of frustration he couldn't vent. He clenched his fist, shook it in annoyance, and said viciously, "Fine, then I’ll go find him myself! Yan Jianyuan, right?"

"A waste of effort." Ji He’s craving for a cigarette had kicked in. His right hand pulled out a lighter, clicking it repeatedly, watching the flame vanish and reappear. He said listlessly, "If he wanted to see you, he wouldn't have used someone else to pass you a message. Since he doesn't want to cooperate with the investigation, the most you'll get to see is his bodyguard."

Captain Feng paced the room twice, walked to the window, threw it open, stuck his head out, and took a deep breath.

Someone knocked on the hospital room door. Thinking it was a nurse on rounds, Captain Feng turned and shouted, "Wait a minute!"

A young officer slipped through the door crack, scanned the room, found his target, and approached with a notebook. "Captain Feng, the results of our morning investigation."

Captain Feng took the notebook and flipped to the middle.

"You’ve been staying at a four-star hotel lately, right? You’re quite rich now. A month ago, you were hiding in a dilapidated rental room that cost four or five hundred a month, raising a nest of cockroaches and mice, playing mind games with the landlord, and falling behind on rent. And now, overnight, you’ve risen from poverty to riches? You’ve been unemployed for over half a year—where did you get the money?"

Xu Yuan stared back with dead-fish eyes, looking every bit the stubborn troublemaker, and gave him a hooligan-like grin.

Captain Feng flipped the page and read a few lines. He stepped forward and kicked the hospital bed, shouting, "Why did you kill Jiang Ping? Do you know him? What does he have to do with your revenge?!"

Before Xu Yuan could speak, the captain warned him harshly, "Don't try to play dumb with me! I'm telling you, the shoes you changed out of were left in that rental room. We extracted blood from the soles. Once the DNA analysis is done, it will be ironclad evidence! Save your breath!"

Unexpectedly, Xu Yuan admitted it quite readily: "I killed him!"

"Doesn't that beast deserve to die? He drove his classmate to death—why shouldn't he pay with his own life? He was just a little more useless than Liang Yizheng, lacking a powerful father to protect him, but he’s just as deserving of death as that Liang guy. Killing him was a service to the people!"

He laughed wildly, showing not a shred of remorse for his crime, only the indulgence and cruelty of someone who had completely given up on himself. He let himself slide into a depraved moral abyss, even describing the crime scene to the police with vivid detail.

"Do you know how he begged me for mercy before he died? He said he had a wife and kids at home and told me to spare him, even wanting me to look at the photos on his phone. I couldn't help but laugh when I heard it. He had a human life on his conscience, yet he was living a happy life, and he even used his family as a shield. How could there be such a despicable, shameless person in this world? I didn't agree, so he started cursing me. Even as he drew his last breath, he was still spewing venomous curses—that was his true nature!"

The reaction of the group was different from what he expected.

Xu Yuan’s unbridled laughter rang through the room. After a long while, receiving no rebuttal from the police, the sharp, acidic thrill of his verbal lashing lost its target and gradually died down.

"Your money was earned because someone hired you to kill Jiang Ping, wasn't it? 'Service to the people'—you certainly know how to put a dignified hat on your own head." Ji He tossed his lighter in his hand, not looking at the man across from him, and scoffed, "That is indeed your true nature."

Xu Yuan flew into a rage and cursed, kneeling up on the hospital bed, ready to snap. Before he could go crazy, two officers nearby pressed him down with practiced speed.

"Don't move! Behave yourself!"

Captain Feng, disgusted by the sight, snapped, "Take him to the bathroom and let him look at his own piss!"

Ji He pulled out a cigarette, gestured to the others with the pack, and turned to leave.

***

Seeing Ji He leave, Lu Shengxing, no longer restricted by the hierarchy, immediately declared himself king. He grabbed his bag and bounded forward, volunteering, "Let me! Let me wake up his sleeping soul!"

He asked Xu Yuan enthusiastically, "Mr. Xu, do you truly think that the person who led the bullying against Xu Yuan—"

Lu Shengxing casually leaned over the notebook in Captain Feng’s hand, scanned the abbreviated surname written there, and, not bothering to memorize the real name, used that instead: "That Wu fellow, does he deserve to die?"

Xu Yuan cursed at him the moment he opened his mouth. "Are you sick? Get lost!"

Lu Shengxing grabbed a small stool, sat by the head of the bed, and leaned forward, closing the distance between them with a look of insincere earnestness. "Look, you’re bullying the weak again. Cursing me is picking on the young. Just like how you killed Jiang Ping but didn't dare kill Liang Yizheng. You’re cowardly—"

Before he could finish, Xu Yuan interrupted him in a fit of shame and anger: "You’re full of crap! Liang Yizheng won't have a good ending! Death is too easy for him!"

Captain Feng patted Lu Shengxing on the shoulder, signaling him to give up the seat.

Lu Shengxing shrugged and refused, his tongue sharp. "Think about it carefully. Why do you know so clearly what Wu did to Xu Yuan, as if you saw it with your own eyes? How would Xu Yuan know such details? Why is it that in your memories, it’s from Wu’s first-person perspective?"

The young man on the bed suddenly froze. His pupils trembled, and images flashed through his mind like a revolving lantern. His expression turned to ice, freezing over inch by inch.

Lu Shengxing, counting on the two officers to hold him down, pressed his advantage. "Why are you so convinced that Xu Yuan could have made something of himself? Is it because you’ve seen what he looked like when he was successful?

"Look at you, as poor as a vagrant. You’ve worked for over twenty years, and your savings aren't worth the soles of Liang Yizheng’s shoes. Little Liang had a powerful father to hold an umbrella for him, so you could argue he was just luckier than you. But Xu Yuan was just a punching bag for you to beat and scold back then. How could he have earned so much money?"

"You envy how Liang Yizheng enjoyed society’s bias toward victims by twisting black into white, and you crave Xu Yuan’s success and status. So, when someone told you that you were Xu Yuan, your failed life suddenly saw a glimmer of reversal. You found a reason for your downfall and a target for your resentment. Following this line of thought makes life easier. Society owes you, so you should expose the truth and gain the sympathy of netizens, right?"

As Lu Shengxing fired off his rapid-fire questions, the young man remained dazed.

Outside, the sounds of footsteps and rolling carts passed by. His eyes shifted bit by bit, until he heard the string of his sanity snap completely, and a loud, buzzing roar filled his mind.

Horror, palpitations, shock, panic, and a desperate, lifeline-like doubt—all these emotions churned together like a massive boulder rolling from a height, smashing down on his head, burying him.

His fingers clawed out, skin torn and bloody, but he couldn't escape the suppression of his panic. He desperately wanted to leave, struggling and kicking wildly on the hospital bed.

The officers on both sides held him down firmly, tying his limbs to the sides of the bed with sheets.

The feeling of being bound, a feeling he couldn't resist, caused his brain to experience a tearing pain, as if a boulder were grinding it against a wheel. In his delirium, he felt as if he couldn't feel the physical pain anymore—it was all just a hallucination.

After a long while, he finally heard his own shrill scream: "No—no, it's not true!!"

Soon, someone covered his mouth.

His lungs expanded, but the air he inhaled seemed to be sucked away by blood; he was about to drown on dry land.

He saw Lu Shengxing’s mouth moving, the sound bypassing his ears and going straight into his mind: "Xu Yuan wasn't lucky enough to meet you. You weren't lucky enough to meet Xu Yuan. Isn't this just what people call karma?"

After paving the way for so long, Lu Shengxing finally said: "Don't get angry now. You said yourself that you deserved it. Now you’ve exercised the justice in your heart and avenged Xu Yuan."

The young man’s skin turned red, like a boiled shrimp, and he arched his body in agony.

Medical staff rushed in from outside to check his condition.

Lu Shengxing stepped back, waiting for him to catch his breath and shout with all his might: "Xu Yuan! Damn him! He’s the one who forced me to kill! It’s all fake! What I said earlier was a lie!"

Once Lu Shengxing had seen enough of the spectacle, only the two young officers remained to guard the room.

Thinking he’d been left behind, Lu Shengxing hurried out to find the others, only to see Ji He, Captain Feng, and the other old smokers standing in the smoking area, puffing away in silence. The white smoke they exhaled was thick enough to shroud them.

They didn't communicate, just kept producing toxic air. They all looked miserable; if you gave them a pen, they could write a hundred thousand words of "suffering literature" on the spot.

After finishing their cigarettes, they moved to a ventilated area to clear the smell before heading back to the precinct.

Lu Shengxing followed, keeping a small, disgusted distance from them, and asked loudly, "Do you need me to educate you on the dangers of smoking?"

Captain Feng said, "The dangers of this job are greater."

At the parking lot, Lu Shengxing squeezed into the car right behind Ji He.

Captain Feng, sitting in the driver's seat, smiled and added, "This young man is quite energetic. Your mental fortitude is quite suited for being a criminal investigator."

Lu Shengxing asked, "What kind of personality is suited for being a criminal investigator?"

"Hard to say. But there is one type that definitely isn't." Captain Feng glanced at the listless young officer in the passenger seat and slapped his forehead. "Those who empathize with suspects too easily don't last long as investigators."

Lu Shengxing leaned over the back of the front seat and asked, "Can that be trained?"

Ji He cleared his throat: "Ahem."

Captain Feng looked back and confirmed that Ji He had a bit of a bias against Lu Shengxing, constantly ignoring the young man in subtle and not-so-subtle ways.

Why be like that? He’s just a bit extroverted, isn't he?

Ji He received Captain Feng’s judgmental look, stared back, and said two words: "Pangu."

"Pangu?" Lu Shengxing immediately picked up, not understanding but being respectful. "Do you want to hear the story of Pangu?"

Captain Feng frowned imperceptibly, realizing things were getting a bit scary.

He actually didn't refuse?

Lu Shengxing said, "That’s an elementary school myth, so you guys probably aren't interested. By the way, have you checked the news today? If not, should I chat with you about the latest hot topics?"

Captain Feng said apprehensively, "No need, get some rest. You’ve said quite a lot in the hospital room already."

Lu Shengxing pulled out his phone and said considerately, "Don't worry about me, I have iron lungs and a golden throat. Although I’m not great at singing, my stamina is incredibly strong!"

Half an hour later, the car was unfortunately stuck in traffic in the city center.

The people in the car, like they were filming a sad music video, all simultaneously turned their heads to look out the window.

Lu Shengxing, halfway through his monologue, felt a bit lonely when no one chimed in. "What’s so interesting outside? Why aren't you guys talking?"

Captain Feng thought to himself: How could anyone dare to chime in?

He adjusted the rearview mirror out of boredom and saw Ji He’s expression. He didn't know if his own mindset had changed, but he felt he could see a bit of Zen-like emptiness in the other man’s face.

Ji He was tapping his fingers, editing a text message to Fang Qingzhou.

Ji He: Lu Shengxing is in B City now, with us.
Fang Qingzhou: ??
Fang Qingzhou walked out of the teaching building, stopped under the shade of the trees by the road, and saw Ji He’s text. She scrolled down to check Lu Shengxing’s account, which she had blocked, and found he had indeed messaged her to report he was coming to B City.

Zhou Suirong stopped as well, standing by to wait for her.

Fang Qingzhou: Are you good at complimenting people?
Ji He: ??
Fang Qingzhou: You’d better be.
Ji He: I haven't met anyone worth developing that skill for yet.
Fang Qingzhou: 1
Ji He spent a long time typing, likely comprehending her hint, then deleted the chat box and sent her a period.

Fang Qingzhou pulled out an emoji that matched her mood to use.

Fang Qingzhou: [Fluffy cat with hair standing on end]
Ji He: [Fluffy cat with hair standing on end]

Zhou Suirong grabbed one of Fang Qingzhou’s hands and led her forward.

Ji He: If I ask him to perform a crosstalk or a stand-up show, would that be offensive?
Fang Qingzhou: Yes, he’s shy. He’s not good at performing.
Ji He’s fingers on the keypad pressed down a bit harder: What do you mean by shy?
Fang Qingzhou sent her a screenshot of a definition. Then added: There will be slight differences in individual expression.
Ji He: Oh.

Two seconds later.

Ji He asked worriedly: Will he be more enthusiastic after we get to know him?
Fang Qingzhou: After you get to know him, you can try asking him to perform crosstalk.
Ji He: Hmm.

The two ended this solemn academic discussion.

Fang Qingzhou put away her phone and realized Zhou Suirong had brought her to a small restaurant near the school.

Zhou Suirong went in to order, and Fang Qingzhou sat down at a table by the entrance.

Opposite her, a cleaner was resting, leaning on a broom and looking at the treetops in front of the shop. She looked up too and found a bird's nest high up.

Zhou Suirong came back, looked up with her, and didn't understand what she was looking at.

"Little Zhou," Fang Qingzhou called.
"Hmm?"
Fang Qingzhou said, "My neck is stiff."

Zhou Suirong reached out to knead the back of her neck and said helplessly, "Little ancestor, you need to exercise."

Fang Qingzhou moved her spine and said quickly, "My neck is fine, I was just teasing you."

Zhou Suirong didn't understand how her neck being stiff could be connected to teasing him, but he habitually ignored the canyon-like gap in between. After all, Fang Qingzhou’s brain cells liked to jump around like the most energetic antelopes. It was perfectly normal for the electric sparks they threw off to form strange links.

Fang Qingzhou said, "Because you’ve been talking less. You weren't happy in the office."

"Are you concerned about me?" Zhou Suirong straightened his chopsticks, his voice dragging long and sounding sarcastic. "I thought you only cared about the person on your phone’s lock screen."

Fang Qingzhou was momentarily stunned by his sharp, half-hearted jab. She explained, "Setting it as a lock screen is just for convenience. That way, when I’m asking someone for directions, I just need to light up the screen without having to enter the album and keep searching."

This excuse would sound flimsy from anyone else, but coming from Fang Qingzhou, it was reasonable and logical.

Zhou Suirong’s expression relaxed a bit, though he still felt a knot in his heart. Reminding her of it felt petty, so he just said "Oh" and used a tissue to wipe the oil stains off the table.

Fang Qingzhou observed his expression and added, "Besides, I don't really use my phone that much anyway."

Zhou Suirong blurted out, "Then what do you use?"

Fang Qingzhou held up her hands and grabbed the empty air, gesturing: "Tablets and computers."

That was true. Fang Qingzhou only carried her phone when she went out, and she didn't go out often before.

Zhou Suirong couldn't find his footing and turned his face away, not saying a word.

Fang Qingzhou was silent for a while, then said, "If you mind, I can change the lock screen."

Zhou Suirong crumpled the used tissue into a ball and put it on the edge of the table. He recited "calm down" to himself several times, but when he spoke, his voice was still tinged with sourness: "Why would I mind? It’s just a photo. I’m not a wild dog desperate to mark my territory. If you find it convenient, just keep using it."

Fang Qingzhou understood and looked down to search for a new picture in her album.

Zhou Suirong glanced at her out of the corner of his eye: "How many photos of him do you have saved? You take such ugly photos of me, but you have some skill when taking his."

"I don't have any more." Fang Qingzhou felt it necessary to remind him, "That photo was sent to me by you."

Zhou Suirong said decisively, "Impossible!"

Fang Qingzhou said, "That day he came to our studio, you ran in and told me there was someone very beautiful outside and asked if I was interested. Then you secretly took a photo and sent it to me."

Zhou Suirong: "..."

Damn. It seemed there was such a thing.

Zhou Suirong couldn't keep being stubborn, and feeling guilty, he said, "I thought you would be interested."

Fang Qingzhou: "I wasn't interested."
Zhou Suirong: "Oh."

The two locked eyes, and Zhou Suirong unnaturally avoided her gaze.

Fang Qingzhou: "..."
Zhou Suirong: "..."

The owner brought the noodles over.

Fang Qingzhou took a bite, her reaction cycle finally catching up. With the wonder of someone discovering a new continent, she broke the silence: "Are you jealous?"